Why I hated the Virtous woman and four others

How many of us have seen this woman, the woman we all cannot stand, the one we all tried to be and couldn't be and so we responded by hating her because hate in itself is a form of defense. I have been that girl and for me, there was;

  • The woman who was 'mysterious'; She had this thing about her that made guys instinctively follow her. She had guys eating out of her fingers. She was 'Anne Boleyn' in Tudors, she was the face that could launch a thousand Ships. I hated this woman because I had never met her. She was either in a movie or someone knew someone that knew someone that knew her- I felt at least if I could meet her, I could learn from her what make her tick and so because I couldn't be her and even be around her to learn from her, I hated her, with everything I had.
  •  The woman who was 'different'; She wasn't like every other girl, she was the type to turn a playboy into a dedicated husband. Oh, this different woman could tame a bad boy and when men came in contact with her, they went on about her 'different' she was, not like every other girl. She had never been played, never been stood up, whatever we common females complained about, she had never experienced.  I hated this woman because she put me in a trap, I tried so hard to be different and truly, I was often described as such and lost out on the opportunity to me. So instead of living and just being me, I became a robot trying hard to attain the title of 'different'.
  • The woman who had it all; To be honest, I did not hate this woman because I believed I could be her. She had everything, beauty, a successful career, a well adjusted home etc. She was the type who became a CEO at 30 with degrees and lots of investment and property. I started out my career believeing I could be this woman with so much energy and love for the job, saving every penny and investing my money just to be this. This woman made my 25th birthday the worst. I felt like a failure on that day, haba all I had was a job and little investments my dad helped me with. I hadn't gotten any promotion and I did not see myself becoming a CEO at 30. And so, at 25, this woman became someone I could never be, a lie sold to me and I hated her for it. I had worked so hard to be her and I hadn't succeed.
  • The virtuous woman; Growing up, I saw women endure all forms of ill treatment just to be termed 'a virtuous woman' She was also an unrealistic standard to which all women were held. Haba, only her one all those attributes. I almost got to the point where I screamed, I don't want to be a virtuous woman oh, let me just be me. A synonym for the virtuous woman will be a woman with 'wife material'
  • The Me who hated these four women; I found out that I really didn't like the woman who hated the four women above because I hadn't found myself, I didn't know the woman I was. That woman was trapped in between trying to be and hating the four women above and so one day I decided to let go of hating and trying to be any of these women and I realized that I had always been the four women above;
 I was mysterious because there will always be something about me no one understands besides a few people have described me as such, I was different because no one else was like me and by just being my best me, I brought something to the world no one else had to offer. While I did not have all I hoped to have, I learnt to be grateful and count my blessings, appreciating each step and falling in love with my journey, the woman who had it all was walking her own path and while I admired her, I was enjoying my own journey. As for the virtuous woman, I tell myself that the book of Proverbs was written by a man who had 1,000 women in his life so he too couldn't find her. I'll just spend each day being the best version of myself, striving for my goals and appreciating every blessing and everyday I wake up, I choose to be ME.

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  1. Wow!!! * this is good!!!! lol @ the virteous woman .... For me, i do not hate cos I like to copy with pride !!! I stay true to my self so sometimes I am kinda weird and different !!!!